Faces of FX

Posted in film on August 31st, 2005 by bucksatan

Ya know, the Japanese are one weird bunch, I have to say. With their hardcore bondage fetishes, bukkake and horror films it seems like anything goes over there, which is fine with me. I found this little “gem” while searching on Snopes for a rumor about iodine and Tim Horton’s coffee, under the “snuff” category. (Don’t ask..) Anyway, without further ado, and a strong warning about hitting this site after you’ve downed that juicy hamburger for lunch, I present: “Guinea Pig Films!”

[seriously, folks... not for the squeamish.]

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The New Ron Jeremy

Posted in film on August 20th, 2005 by bucksatan

I watch porn. Any guy that says he doesn’t is either blind, Christian or [if you'll pardon the expression] pussy-whipped.

Now that I’ve got that out of the way…

The above photo is of some ubiquitous stunt-cock asshole that is, in my humble opinion, the new Ron Jeremy.

This is not a compliment.

As Al Goldstein once said, “Ron Jeremy would never have gotten laid if producers had not paid women to have sex with him.” and (paraphrasing) “If I see Ron Jeremy come on another woman’s stomach, I’ll have a contract taken out to have him killed.”

That’s pretty much my sentiments regarding the above, meth-addled, hair-pie-faced, pseudo-biker-looking motherfucker.

Don’t agree? Without going into graphic detail, just imagine this fur-bearing, balding, bug-eyed rodent’s face the next time you have sex with your girlfriend or wife.

Get the picture?

‘Nuff said.

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Let us pause for a complete Geek-Out.

Posted in film on July 27th, 2005 by bucksatan

Well, I just saw the theatre trailer for “Serenity”:http://www.serenitymovie.com/ - the film based on the “cult” television series by Joss “Everytime I make something cool, tee vee executives stomp all over it” Whedon. It played before “Batman Begins” (which, considering I thought it would be a complete piece of shit, was really quite exciting.) The Serenity trailer, here in Toronto, is exactly the same as the online version, although seeing it on the big screen was nice. The only complaint I had is that the boobs at the theatre had the volume hella-low. Oh well.

Serenity is coming out in September. I won’t be standing in line like some Star Wars geek, but you can bet I am not missing a flick I feel will be better than any of the other science-fiction offerings over the last decade.

This movie. Will. Kick. Ass.

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