It’s always kind of annoyed me that the stewardess makes me take off my headphones when I fly when the plane is either taking off or landing.
It’s not as though I am using any kind of wireless device. The last time I flew, I told this nazi of a stewardess that it comforts me to hear music on take off and landing because I have a fear of flying. She made me take them off anyway with the excuse that in case there were “emergency instructions” they needed to communicate with the passengers, I wouldn’t be able to hear them.
My response was simply, “Honey, if we’re going down on take off or landing, there are no instructions written that are going to help us. We’re all going to die.“
1:21:39 PM BuCkSaTaN: Remind me never to get this fucking chicken again… WTF! It’s called “garlic chicken” when they should have called it “gristle and bone chicken”. Hey! – Let’s hack up a bunch of chicken thighs and see how many splinters people can choke on… That’s what I enjoy… eating real careful like, like a dog that’s been beaten then had a plate of horse meat set in front of him. How could anyone find this desirable?? Mmmm…a mouth full of spinal disks. Trying to separate the meat from the tiny bones… good times. It’s as if someone threw a bunch of wings into a food processor and dumped some gravy on them.
1:29:37 PM BuCkSaTaN: Worst lunch ever.
1:30:42 PM Gary: Cripes.
1:31:18 PM BuCkSaTaN: Thank god I got noodles and vegetables or I’d starve on the 2g of chicken I just ate.
11:30:06 AM Gary: I think it’s gonna be a grease burger day!
11:30:13 AM BuCkSaTaN: Hey! Me too!
11:30:23 AM Gary: some nice cheddar cheese
11:30:34 AM Gary: side of poutine?
11:35:54 AM BuCkSaTaN: Nah, I have free McDonalds coupons and I’m gonna cash em ALL in…
11:39:20 AM Gary: oh no
11:39:42 AM BuCkSaTaN: I don’t care what you say… I have Big Mac craving.
11:39:43 AM Gary: mcd’s gives me mud butt next day
11:39:56 AM BuCkSaTaN: sick
11:40:02 AM Gary: I get the serious McShits
11:40:17 AM BuCkSaTaN: Perhaps you should see a doctor about that.
11:40:32 AM Gary: it’s mcd’s that does it hahaha
11:40:45 AM BuCkSaTaN: mmmm… no, no I think not. I think you should see someone. Seriously.
11:40:45 AM Gary: my body doesn’t digest it very well
11:41:12 AM Gary: I mentioned it to my naturopath and she said stop eating mcd’s hahaha
11:41:22 AM BuCkSaTaN: naturopath… hahahahaha
11:41:28 AM Gary: hehe
11:41:49 AM BuCkSaTaN: Of course she’d say that… but of course she’d also say, eat a bunch of grass and rocks too.
11:42:13 AM BuCkSaTaN: Here Gary, drink this delicious mixture of wheat-grass with bug bile.
11:42:22 AM Gary: Next time you’re in a forest, give a tree a hug then eat all the shit around your feet?
11:42:41 AM BuCkSaTaN: Don’t forget to sprinkle a little oat-germ on it.
11:43:03 AM Gary: wheatgrass is tastey tho
11:43:07 AM BuCkSaTaN: I’ll take the big mac thanks.
11:43:10 AM Gary: haha
11:43:10 AM BuCkSaTaN: You only live once.
11:43:15 AM Gary: true
11:43:37 AM Gary: and i wanna leave a rotted intestined corpse
11:43:39 AM BuCkSaTaN: And you can have a nice healthy handful of carib with tofu-vomit on it for dessert.
11:43:51 AM Gary: SWEET
11:44:03 AM Gary: now i’m feeling sick
11:44:12 AM Gary: i’d love a big mac
11:44:15 AM Gary: double big mac
11:44:21 AM Gary: with extra mac sauce
11:44:28 AM BuCkSaTaN: Thaaaat’s right, abstain from everything so you die with a nice healthy corpse. What a waste of life’s enjoyments.
11:44:59 AM BuCkSaTaN: Christ… it’s like, hoard all the money you can and leave it to someone else.
11:45:08 AM BuCkSaTaN: Why not just give it away in this life? Save yourself the trouble…
11:45:18 AM Gary: I love the line …. He died suddenly. He jogged everyday and died suddenly.
11:45:28 AM BuCkSaTaN: Oh I can’t spend… no no no… I need to make sure everyone else can enjoy the fruits of my labor.
11:45:37 AM Gary: yeah true…
11:45:55 AM BuCkSaTaN: There are no guarantees in life except death and taxes.
11:45:56 AM Gary: that’s it…
11:46:04 AM Gary: i’m gonna get me some crack tonight hahahaha
11:46:08 AM BuCkSaTaN: hahahaha
11:46:17 AM BuCkSaTaN: With a heroin chaser!
11:46:18 AM Gary: sheesh
11:46:30 AM Gary: need some hookers too!
11:46:31 AM BuCkSaTaN: Well let’s not get crazy now…
11:46:52 AM Gary: haha
11:47:01 AM BuCkSaTaN: I mean, enjoy within reason… but how the fuck am I going to enjoy life with all my money locked away in the bank and chewing on a celery stick?
11:47:15 AM Gary: you’re not
11:47:28 AM BuCkSaTaN: mmmm… lima beans. That’s livin!
11:47:37 AM Gary: HAHA
I really like this site. It’s more than just a listing of tunes and habits. I’ve found more than a few bands by their rather accurate collecting of “like” bands. And given there is really no such thing as categorizations in music these days, places like last.fm and imeem – which actually allows an iPhone app in Canada – are a welcome and entertaining couple of sites.
Anyway, here’s my top 20 bands according to last.fm: Muse should be higher, really.
| 1 |
 |
|
|
|
1,054
|
| 2 |
|
|
|
|
638
|
| 3 |
|
|
|
|
630
|
| 4 |
|
|
|
|
597
|
| 5 |
|
|
|
|
486
|
| 6 |
|
|
|
|
411
|
| 7 |
|
|
|
|
410
|
| 8 |
|
|
|
|
382
|
| 9 |
|
|
|
|
337
|
| 10 |
|
|
|
|
333
|
| 11 |
|
|
|
|
326
|
| 12 |
|
|
|
|
307
|
| 13 |
|
|
|
|
261
|
| 13 |
|
|
|
|
261
|
| 15 |
|
|
|
|
260
|
| 16 |
|
|
|
|
245
|
| 17 |
|
|
|
|
241
|
| 18 |
|
|
|
|
233
|
| 18 |
|
|
|
|
233
|
| 20 |
|
|
|
|
224
|
By the way, fuck the CRTC.
A One Man Woodstock
Yep. There he sits. Busker-Boy. He craves attention so much, he claimed the corner across the street from my place, tapped into the electrical outlet from one of the street lights and started mutilating everything from ‘Freebird’ to ‘Stairway to Heaven’. Oh how talented his noodling is. He wears his sunglasses at night as a tribute to Corey Hart and has been sitting there for three hours. As I write, he launches into another wanna-be-musician classic; “Wild Thing”. Now he is singing it at top volume.
Luckily, I’ve looked into the noise statutes and as I prepare to call the police on this rock n’ roll cretin, his pick flies across the street. Ah, a small moment of silence while he tunes his guitar. I’m trying to understand why Busker-Boy is sitting there. Did his girlfriend leave him? Did his dog die? Did he lose his job and get thrown out of his musician-shared living space?
No matter, because once the cruiser pulls up and tells Busker-Boy to move it along, he’ll have another sad moment in his life to write about.
Poor, sad Busker-Boy. How he must yearn. How his artistic, nova heart must call out to him. Well, for today, I must quash Busker-Boy’s muse.
The strains of ‘House of the Rising Sun’ waft into my apartment as I begin to dial.
4-1-6-8-0-8…
Busker-Boy tries to find just the right chord.
1:06:52 PM BuCkSaTaN: cold cuts footlong… meh… it’ll do.
1:07:13 PM BuCkSaTaN: A bland sandwich for my bland mood. Wheeeeee!
1:08:16 PM Gary Gnu: mmmm…nitrates=colon cancer=diaper when you’re 40
1:09:24 PM BuCkSaTaN: Delicious nitrates…. mmmm
1:09:58 PM BuCkSaTaN: And sweet sweeet preservatives. The prolonger of life… mmmm
1:10:29 PM BuCkSaTaN: Besides you boob, I’m already 43 and no diaper in sight yet.
1:11:11 PM BuCkSaTaN: Depends would be cool. I’d never have to leave my desk. Just squeeze out a loaf here as I type.
1:14:41 PM Gary Gnu: So I guess I should be wearing a diaper too.
1:14:58 PM Gary Gnu: I want a toilet desk!
1:16:55 PM Gary Gnu: a computer chair with proper plumbing…
1:17:09 PM BuCkSaTaN: iToilet.
1:17:20 PM BuCkSaTaN: Or the iDumper.
1:17:54 PM BuCkSaTaN: Then Apple can forget to ship with an upgrade and the thing starts spraying feces everywhere until you download it.
1:18:43 PM BuCkSaTaN: “Can’t talk now Ted! My iDumper is covering me in last night’s beer and chili dogs!”
1:22:44 PM Gary Gnu: hahahaa
1:22:45 PM Gary Gnu: love it!
1:22:49 PM BuCkSaTaN: haha
1:23:20 PM BuCkSaTaN: Ahhh now to burn the bleached bun off my teeth with a nice Diet Coke. This is the life.
