I don’t like spam anymore than anyone else, but you really get an idea of how angry, frustrated and just plain childish people are by their irrational reactions to getting something they “did not sign up for”. The absolute viciousness in how people respond is, in my opinion, completely unwarranted. When I see some of the responses to my company email “newsletter”, from a verified email address, I imagine these same childish, reactive idiots jumping up and down on a grocery store flyer they’ve received in their physical snail mail box, screaming obscenities – which, by the way is completely unsolicited.

I can understand getting angry for getting consistent emails from some porn bozos (almost non-existent these days), viagra or get-rich-quick schemes, but when someone who, for one reason or another, filled out a form and checked an opt-in box, then has a case of short-term memory when they recieve a single email blast in six months, well, there is just no rationalizing that kind of behavior. I can only speculate that they think they’ve been truly violated on some level, which is not the case. You cannot apologize or bother wasting time to explain to these hot-heads that they did indeed enter their information at one time or another and check the opt-in box at the bottom of that form or I would not have their email address.

People send back one-shot emails with all sorts of knee-jerk comments from “stop sending me junk!” to “I’ll make sure to tell all my friends never to use your product”. I particularly love the latter – considering that this sociopaths’ little circle of friends would not even be close to bringing down a corporation. These responses tend to escalate to literal death threats, if you can fathom that. If this same person threatened to kill the sender of a snail-mail flyer, they’d be getting up to 5 years imprisonment for threatening the life of a fellow human being.

In the end, there are few people that actually take the time to respond, given that there are spam-filters and black-lists that the more tech-savvy of us utilize to keep unwanted email to a minimum. I don’t mind getting unsolicited email in my box – as long as it’s not repetitious overkill – and do not consider an email that proposes something I can actually use or find interesting to be spam, but these nit-wits with short-term memories really need to think before responding by banging their rattle on the bars of their crib, before firing off some of the angry and unnecessary comments I see.

Look jackass, just scroll to the bottom, “unsubscribe” to the mailing list and shut the fuck up.

’nuff said.

1:37:01 PM Gjuddy McMudd: [link to YouTube]
1:37:06 PM Gjuddy McMudd: he’s telling a joke I think
1:37:36 PM BuCkSaTaN: What in hell!
1:37:53 PM BuCkSaTaN: It’s funny cause he’s saying swear words…
1:38:03 PM Gjuddy McMudd: holy christ…that might be the worst told joke I’ve ever heard
1:38:07 PM BuCkSaTaN: hahaha
1:39:09 PM BuCkSaTaN: I like the way his lapel mic starts to short out near the end.
1:39:49 PM Gjuddy McMudd: …and I said…big pussy, how’d you expect me to find sumpin’ in here when some motherfucker done lost a mack truck in here!
1:39:54 PM Gjuddy McMudd: and that’s the punchline

I recently purchased a Blackberry Bold from Rogers – an upgrde to my currently existing plan. As well, I ordered their service for “Talkspot” – a wireless router that allows you the convenience of unlimited long distance from home over Wi-Fi for $20 a month. Pitched at the college crowd, this seemed the perfect solution, since I tried to get their home phone set up to no avail. (They took the order but the service just never materialized.) I told them to not bother. I purchased a Skype account for $35 USD a YEAR and although dropped calls and the Blackberry software I had to also purchase for $50 USD are far from perfect, it’s an annoyance I am willing to endure over this behemoths’ unbelievably poor service and outrageous expense.

This would be all well and fine, until I received my bill for this upgrade – charging me over SEVEN HUNDRED dollars for the Blackberry unit. They also felt it necessary to charge me TWICE for the router – which, two months later, still hasn’t arrived. I don’t know how many of you has opened a phone bill for over a thousand dollars, but let’s just say, the floor dropped out from underneath me and I hit the fucking roof.

Being a long-time customer of Rogers since 1993, I stupidly assume that they would want to keep my continued business (and will of course, for the next three years, since they’ve received their pound of flesh in the form of their insidious contract) by offering somewhat of an incentive other than their little “clubs” and “discounts” with the laughable label of “V.I.P.“.

Well folks, it doesn’t end there. As Christmas is soon to arrive, every whore of a corporation will be rolling out their Christmas campaigns, to net the hapless masses who have yet to sell their souls to one brand or another. To add insult to injury, Rogers is now offering (a mere two months after the release of the Bold) an incentive to NEW customers to sign in blood for three years and only pay TWO HUNDRED dollars for the Blackberry Bold.

On the subject of service, these bastards have set up a human chess machine behind their long-winded sales tactics and hieroglyphic mobile plans. Scream all you like, but as a numbered consumer you have access to no one above a high-school or college-aged CSR. This (brilliant, I must admit), albeit half-assy trained line of defense, wears down the diligent consumer, once they’ve dug their heels in and invested hours on the phone explaining to human and robot alike their woes and leaves them to either buy out their contract, cancel services that never arrive or wearily fork over the money before the power-off switch is thrown.

1984, Brazil and various other red-tape infested visions come to mind. These nefarious corporate greed-heads must be stopped. I almost pray for a depression.

Yes, I have been fucked. Yes, my anus is stinging and yes, I will be extremely wary next time around.

This is quite a bold claim… but can they cure the heartbreak of psoriasis?